I’m dreading tomorrow night

Tomorrow night is Halloween and to be honest I am dreading it. My parents are not fans, I believe it has something to do with my dad as a milkman having to untie about a million gates on his early morning round after Halloween. But it also has a lot to do with the underlying message, while ‘trick or treat’ is light-hearted or fun basically it can be translated into ‘give me something nice or I will do something nasty to you!’ Which has happened.

I was furious the day I woke up to discover my parents house had been egged. I worried about how it made my parents feel, I wondered who had done something like this…a neighbor…a complete stranger? I felt like my house and my family had been attacked and I think it was that moment I decided I would never do Trick or Treating.

When I moved in with the ex I wondered what we would do about Halloween. In a small village would we be ostracized if we didn’t partake – turns out I had nothing to worry about. I was moved out long before Halloween made an appearance.

But this year I am not. I am alone. In my house.

Being alone in the house I hate opening the door to strangers. I have a slightly over-active imagination and no matter who is on the doorstep I wonder what I would do if they pushed their way into my house. Would I scream or would my voice dry up in fear?

The other fact of the matter is that this has been a really expensive month. I had a stupid expensive Hen do for one of my oldest friends and with a trip across the country to her wedding within the next few weeks, which includes 2 nights in a hotel, public transport costs, wedding gifts, drinks on the day, food on the other days… I’m broke. I don’t have money to waste on buying in candy or anything to just give away.

So I’m going to sit in the dark and pretend I am not in. I wish I wasn’t. In fact I am in two minds about cancelling a DIY evening with my folks and instead leaving my little house to hide at their house instead. Yep, I am so worried about trick or treating that I am fearing spending a night in my house.

I know I’m probably over thinking this but I worry far too much about what people think, and I that has lead to me freaking out about tomorrow.

I have printed off a poster saying I don’t want any callers – lets see what happens!

Don’t knock on my door

We take a break from the normal post of self woe and heartbreak so I can metaphorically pee on your Halloween bonfire!

Trick or treat, smell my feet, give me something good to eat- just me?
Trick or treat, smell my feet, give me something good to eat- just me?

From my opening statement it won’t surprise you to learn that the I don’t “do” Halloween. Never really have, you see my parents don’t agree with it. So we didn’t really do the parties, dressing up or trick or treating and as a child I used to wish we did. I can even remember thinking it was thrilling to watch all the other children dressed up, and I would lift up the corner of the curtain to watch everyone else go past in their costumes – although I never saw very much really.

My dad and I were out walking Mity the other night, which has become something of an evening routine, and we took a break from the normal what am I going to do, I miss him so much (yes, you aren’t the only people having to put up with it!) to discuss his dislike of Halloween. I have never really seen the harm with it, as far as I could see it was a bit of fun. however dad’s argument against it got me thinking:

1. Taking candy from a stranger. As children how many times are we told… don’t talk to strangers…… never except candy from strangers….. don’t go and knock on the door of a stranger and take whatever they give you. So maybe we don’t get the other one very often, but as kids we are taught these key rules of safety. Yet for one night these rules are off, and you are actively encouraged to go around taking candy from strangers. Ok, I know that generally speaking people go around to pre-arrange family and friends but still I am sure many people just go up to that stranger.

2. Trick or treat – roughly translated do something nice for me or else….. I have to see my dad’s side with this one. In this day and age, when I daily turn on my computer and read about animal abuse, a man kicked to death for telling kids to stop messing around near his house, computer games causing children to loose a grasp on reality, do we really want to encourage them to go around and get treats by menace?

3. Trick – so you go out with your children, the door isn’t opened and candy isn’t distributed what do you do? Egg the house? through toiled paper over the garden? Tie the gates together with string? Something much worse? Our house was once egged (although not on Halloween) and as a young child this upset me – I thought someone had purposefully targeted my parents and disliked them. The feeling unsettled me. What if the door that isn’t answered belong to an elderly person to afraid/frail to open the door on Halloween, how do they go about cleaning up the mess?

I was going to end the post saying that my mind wasn’t made, that I would still go to Halloween parties if invited, and when/if one day I have children of my own then I would give it some deep thought but probably take them. However, you see the point up there – number 3? Well that wasn’t one of my dads, that was mine and it has only just come to me as I type. The idea of an elderly vulnerable person being scared and having to clean up a mess, knowing how I felt after my house was egged.. I think I am joining the no to Halloween side of the fence!

What do you think? Do you celebrate? Am I over-analysis a bit of fun?

P.s if you don’t want trick or treaters a quick Google search will bring up a number of posters that you can download to display in your window. Please if you see a poster, respect it and stay safe!