Stepping out of the Shadows

So this is something I have been considering for a while, and as generally all I do here is let my thoughts fall on paper screen I thought why not gives these thought and airing too…

I am wondering what it would be like to ‘come out’ to the world, and admit to my nearest and dearest (and all of you) that this is my blog, and this is who I am.

Just to clarify, I am not going to suddenly give you all my name, address and invite you all to tea (although that would be awesome) but if I was less aware of trying to remain anonymous I would be able to post pictures on here without worrying that someone would identify me by my dogs, or my house.

I feel that trying to be 100% ‘off the record’ has held me back, and in some way limited what I can and can’t share (this fully explains the lack of pictures for example!)  On some levels it has freed me up, for example the one time I ranted about my work I wouldn’t have done had I known my boss could see it and some of the future posts I have planned would be easier to hit publish on while I can kid myself my identity is unknown.

But that nagging feeling of this holding me back, and limiting what I share on MY blog won’t go away.

Another reason I remained anonymous was for the ex. He (rightly) didn’t want his life shared online, and with an identifiable ginger collie (Bd) focusing heavily on a blog from Yorkshire… let’s just say you wouldn’t have had to be a maths genius to realise that 2 and 2 made 4. But now, with him taking Bd, I feel I owe him nothing. I don’t care if people who know us both find out I had a hard time with the break up, in fact I no longer care if he reads these posts.

The only people I do worry about is my folks. More than anything I would love to share this with them and celebrate with them as this blog develops and grows; but would I find myself censoring what I write because I knew they were reading? There was one post I wrote ranting at my dad, I worry how he would feel to read it and I worry if I knew he was going to see it if I would have written it in the first place? But this is my blog and I want to be able to share whatever I want to, without having thinking about other peoples feelings. I do that enough in the real world, I analyse and over-analyse everything to death. Here I am truly open, here I am truly me.

But then I would love for this blog to grow and I don’t think it can grow in the way I hope if I continue to censor the images I share. For example, more than anything I want to share before and after pictures of my house. Share with you all what I have achieved, but again if someone puts 2 and 2 together…

I’d love to hear your views on this? Do