Saturday night

It was Saturday night. I am young(ish) free (from commitment, so long as you ignore the mortgage) and single (despite not wanting to be) and I decided that I needed to drag myself out and have a great time. I enrolled the help of one of my long suffering friends, and a night of fun and dancing away troubles until the small hours was agreed upon. The plan was changed slightly when my long suffering friend realised that she had her girls and so would need a baby sitter and altered to a drink in the local pub when said baby sitter had to be home at a reasonable hour. However, I was still going out on a Saturday night and looking forward to it…although after a day of DIY I was less keen, but it had been my idea so I wasn’t able to cancel, especially as a baby sitter had been booked!

Knowing we were going to the local pub I put on a smart top and some jeans. That statement was not as easy as it may sound, you see when I moved in with him I went through my wardrobe and threw away all my clothes that I hadn’t warn during the time we had been together. Obviously I still have draws rammed full of clothes, a fair few pairs of shoes and a double wardrobe of dresses (I’m still a woman) but would you believe I often have nothing to wear? My dresses were either too summer holiday, too smart or too short; same rule applied to my skirts. The tops were either too casual or made me resemble a nun (I wanted to show a little flesh!) the shoes I decided on were lovely, until I realised they were peep toe and I hadn’t had time to paint my toe nails and so I threw on my trusty black heels and headed to collect my friend.

I turned up on her doorstep just as she was jumping in the shower, although before she got in she asked “what are you wearing tonight”. I told her the clothes I was wearing and she said “oh, I was going to go a bit more dressed up, do you fancy raiding my wardrobe?” So whilst she showered I spent another 20 minutes starring at her wardrobe wondering what the hell I was going to wear.

The problem this time was not the lack of clothing but more the very different shapes of mine and my friends body. I have curves, boobs and am 5 ft 4. She is tall, skinny and does not have boobs. The great thing is that we can, and have on many occasions fitted into each others clothes so I wasn’t completely panicked and I do love raiding other peoples wardrobes all I had to do was find the right item. Luckily, I had her two darling daughters on hand to help me. “How about this one” they said as they pulled out a short, lacey black and gold number “or this one” as out came a full length black valor gown. I poured myself a glass of wine.

To be continued…..

My weekend

How to have a weekend like mine:


  • Stay late at work to catch up on mountain of paper work which has built up to due to a two week holiday.
  • Drive half hour commute home (getting stuck behind idiot who only ever drives at 40 mph regardless of speedlimit!)
  • Throw tea down my neck as racing out to a fundraising quiz.
  • Pack bags for weekend with blokey (I hate packing and am the worlds worst packer) ensuring to pack more than you need so everyone looking at your overnight bag will assume you are leaving home.
  • Race to fundraiser to find out the friend you were meeting for a good catch up (and honestly the main reason you were going) wasn’t coming.
  • Finish quiz at 10.30pm and race to blokeys house.
  • Find blokey isn’t at house and instead go to meet him at a local club (11pm) & relax.


  • Have a well deserved lie in
  • Take dog for walk – remember just before putting walking boots on, but having driving to walk location (it was a long way from blokeys home, I am not just lazy!) that walking boots broke on holiday and I am missing 1/3 of my sole.
  • Decide to set off on walk, but as not feeling 100% don’t point out to blokey that he has decided not to follow the path and end up wandering around water logged fields aimlessly!
  • Misjudge what you think is a reed bed, and rather than jumping onto a firm surface end up in water and other substances you would rather not identify up to your ankles!
  • On pulling foot out with broken sole, ensure you have a sole full of above mentioned yuck and flick it over your back!
  • Continue on walk, despite sole getting worse.
  • Once only 1/3 of sole is attached to shoe, ensure you get sole stuck under boot and when flicking foot to release sole cover the front half of you in the above mentioned yuck!
  • Decide to abandon walk, and head into town to purchase new pair or walking boots.
  • Realise on route to town you did not bring your purse with you as you were going on a walk (something which rarely happens) and smile sweetly at blokey.
  • Get to town and remember your socks are brown as your broken walking boots leaked, borrow blokeys socks.
  • Find pair you like with amazing discount on and discover there is a loose stitch which runbs your heal, decide you can mend shoes at home but try and get a discount (succeed) but have this discount cause massive chaos at the tills.
  • Go to visit relatives and play with two young neices (3 and 6 years old).
  • Take them for a walk, when heading home watch in horror as littlest neice falls while skipping and outs teeth through lips! Despite best efforts to comfort carry screaming child home.
  • Try to sort tea.
  • Finally get screaming child to stop scream and have big sister of scream child show you her wobbley tooth which has just fallen out.
  • Try to find loose change for tooth fair (in case she is as rubbish as you and forgot her purse) and appropriate safe place to put tooth.
  • Have blokey turn up to take you home and save your day
  • Relax


  • Do shopping
  • Walk dog (with some training – different story!)
  • Sort out lunch
  • Race to drama rehersal for upcoming show, being organised to take flask, however enure flask leaks so you end up throwing tea all over self twice!
  • Arrive back at blokeys, start to sort out tea, have cupboard fall off wall above you while cooking!
  • Stop cooking to empty cupboard and then hold the half of the cupboard which has fallen while blokey tries to pull the other half of wall.
  • Succeed in removing cupboard, resume cooking tea and relax

Did anyone else have an eventful weekend?