I’m turning into a Human Pizza

I used to think I wasn’t a fussy eater, in fact I didn’t realise I was until I dated a man who actually would eat anything. Just to clarify, not in like weird stuff he ate normal food but the only thing he would turn down was nuts, and that was because he had an allergy, so I don’t think that really counts. On the other hand I don’t like peas, mushrooms, aubergine, cucumber, courgette, green olives (I once ate a whole jar once in one sitting, you do that and see if you can still face them), nuts in chocolate (yes, I did used to use his nut allergy as a reason to ask if “the chocolate brownies contained nuts), hot drinks when eating, fish fingers, and fast food (by that I mean processed crap and not Indian or Chinese takeaways, those I love). What can I say I’m quirky!

As a child I didn’t ever pick from the Childrens Menu. I’m sorry but Pizza n Chips, Burger n Chips or Sausage n Chips do not float my boat; In fact I can take or leave Fish n Chips! Instead I would take my pick from the adults menu and I would usually chose the most expensive thing. Hey, if I’m eating out I want to chose something I can’t make at home and that is a bit different from the norm!

The start of the week saw us celebrating Mums birthday and so we wanted to have something nice for tea. This is not as easy as it sounds. My Mum suffers from Rheumatoid Arthritis, has since she was a child. As well as the aches and pains she suffers from dry mouth syndrome and feels self conscious if we go out to eat s sometimes she struggles cutting. Over the years we have found out the certain foods affect Mums mobility the day after she has eaten them and so she currently can’t eat Milk, Cheese, Butter, Eggs, Tomatoes, Green Peppers, Pork, Pasta, Rice, Potatoes and I feel I am missing one but you get the idea. She can’t have anything too hot as her dry mouth syndrome means she has no saliva. She used to enjoy a Chinese takeaway but the last two have left her with an allergic reaction which nearly resulted in a trip to A & E in the early hours of the morning. Add into the mix my highly lactose intolerant sister and my newly developed reaction to Soya and Dairy and you will get an idea of what happens when we try and eat anything! On occasions we have had to cook four different versions of the same tea to ensure that nothing was contaminated with anything it shouldn’t be – yes, my dad is amazing!!

Anyway after much deliberation my Mum decided she would really like a nice home made pizza. Now to digress the conversation once again, my dad trained as a chef and so when I say home made pizza I don’t mean cheese and tomato on a shop bought base. He prepared two different pizza bottoms from scratch; one plain, one garlic and rosemary. He made a none tomato sauce for my Mum from roasted peppers, garlic and onion. He made a tomato one for the rest of us. We have 4 different types of cheese; 3 goats milk, 1 cows milk. We then got onto the toppings we could chose from prawns, black olives, peppers, onion, fresh basil, fresh oregano, black pudding, bacon, home made Chinese chicken….. again I feel I am forgetting things but you get the idea.

Anyway, dad has one small fault, one which I have inherited, he always over caters. The above was to be eaten by 5 people however having had pizza for mums birthday we had eat ups the next night, and I managed two lunches worth of eat ups as well. That means for the last 4 days I have had pizza every single day.

Tonight I am spending Valentines day with one of my single girlfriends and her kids. When planning I suggested we treated ourselves, kept it simple and ordered a ‘take out’. However she responded that her kids can be a little fussy and so she would just pop to the shops and grab something low hassle that we can fling in the over while opening our first bottle. Just got a text from her…… guess what we are having!!