I don’t know if it’s because tonight was supposed to be date night, or would have been had the guy not vanished off the face of the earth, or if I’m just feeling a little sorry for myself; but I am in a bit of a funk and feeling totally fed up with the whole online dating charade. I can’t be bothered with coming up with witty intro messages, only to be ignored. I want to scream WTF at every balding, 50 + year old man who winks at me or sends an introductory message. No offence guys but seriously…
Anywho, for the first fews days after I signed up I had nothing but issues with the website I had been slightly conned into joining. I would get a daily email (about 11am) telling me who popular me profile was and that as a result I was receiving so much ‘interest’ they would stop updating me via email every time there was a ‘contact’ on my profile. My gut told me it was all bull, I told myself it was all bull, but I will admit it was nice to receive them.
The other annoying issue I had was being told I had ‘contacts’ which I couldn’t actually view – would you believe at one point 40 men had ‘apparently’ sent me emails to introduce themselves to me, yet when I tried to see these emails I could see about 4 new messages. This was more annoying than anything else, not for a moment did I consider that I had actually received 40 messages, but I know for a fact of some messages that have ‘apparently gone missing’ so it does make me worry if I am receiving everything I should be receiving and are all my initial emails getting through? But I digress slightly.
My main point is that while it was all new, exciting and full of possibilities I was being falsely buoyed up by the company; when there was no need cause I was naïve and thought that maybe this could lead to me finding someone special. There were so many possibilities, so man single men out there. Suddenly I wasn’t the only single person in the world (which I know I am not but with all my friends dating or married it often feels like I am, especially as none of them have any single guy friends!)
But now it has been a few weeks. I seem to be seeing the same photos of the same 20 guys. The one guy I did have a spark with has vanished (yes, I may have already told you that) and I am just kinda feeling a bit, ‘what’s the point’. The messages I am receiving, and the guys I am talking to are all the same, nice enough but conversation is basic and there isn’t really a spark. Anyone interesting, or hot, doesn’t seem to be interested in talking to me. Particularly annoying, was the guy who I spent ages thinking about a funny, relevant intro message… he viewed my profile, but never responded.
This is when I need to be being lied to. This is when the emails of support need to be received. It is now that I need the ‘company’ to be like a good girl friend, opening a bottle and telling me that “it’s their loss, all men are idiots and something much better is around the corner”
I am fragile, I am needy. This is not the time to bring the truth. Lie to me God dam it. I don’t need to hear the truth… I can’t handle the truth.