O my god I have verbal diarrhoea

So this weekend I haven’t coped well at all, to the point that I am getting annoyed with myself – yesterday I did not want to get out of bed, and when I finally did I would burst into tears at anything.. I walked into the kitchen and cried, I left the kitchen and cried, a tv advert finished and yep you guessed it. In my defence I would like to point out I am very hormonal, not sleeping and currently ill (if it doesn’t rain it pours right?!) however worse than the unending tears seems to be the fact that I have lost all control of my mouth…

I am now telling complete strangers about my life and not in a breezy happy sort of endearing kind of way..

Exhibit a: The taxi driver.
So on Saturday night I went round to a friend house for a long overdue catch up. She has recently moved back to the area after about 3 years away and so we decided we were in need of a catch up over a bottle of wine (and this time it really was just the one bottle!). I will admit to feeling a little upset when I got into the taxi. Earlier in the day I had been shopping with another friend and it is the first time I have spent a day in that particular place and not been picked up or texted OH on the way home to tell him all about it, so I was a little fragile (and remember I’m ill and hormonal right)

I entered the taxi like any normal human being, I even managed the standard “what time did you start” and “what time do you finish” compulsory questions and then the taxi driver made the mistake of asking me “so have you big plans for tonight”…. and he got it all. The story about how I was recently single, how I don’t want to be single, how I can’t understand why I am single and that I am going to die alone with 50 cats (ok maybe that last bit I did leave out) but this poor guy got much more than was required or even necessary for the entire trip and when I wasn’t over sharing I was apologising for over-sharing before telling him something else he didn’t need to know. I would like to explain that I genuinely tried not to tell him, and did survive a few minutes. I can’t even use the excuse that I was filling an awkward silence as there wasn’t any and it was a short journey. I literally just opened my mouth and dumped the entire mess that is me on him.

It may surprise you to learn that he wasn’t my return taxi driver on the way home, and I now probably have a warning next to my name and will be avoided by taxi drivers for the rest of my life!

Exhibit b: The work colleague:
Before writing this I went to heat up my soup for lunch in the microwave. While I was waiting for my soup to reach the required temperature a work colleague came into the kitchen to make himself a cup of coffee. Having exchanged ‘nice weekend’ pleasantries he made the mistake of mentioning Christmas and once again my response was sharing a little too much. I told him how I was supposed to be spending the first two weeks on holiday, to celebrate OHs big birthday this year. I told him that while out there we should have been celebrating mine also and on the 18th OH and I should be celebrating another year together and how before “he chucked me out” (direct quote) we had even planned how we were going to spend this new years.

Yep he picked up his coffee and ran!

What the hell is wrong with me????

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2 thoughts on “O my god I have verbal diarrhoea

  1. Ha ha, I’ve spent a few taxi journeys listening to the driver spout stuff I wasn’t remotely interested in! Can I give you a list of hairdressers to get revenge on for me?

    • Of course – I think you owe me one for letting me moan! However my best totally inappropriate very funny making people squirm was a parcel delivery guy who asked “Miss or Mrs” and I responded with “Miss, he doesn’t want to Marry me!!”

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