Judgement

I care too much about what people think, I know this, it’s part of the reason I have taken over a week to write any more posts – I am only a few weeks into my own blog and already I am struggling over posts wondering is it funny enough, too emotional, not emotional enough, engaging, will people like it or not…. you won’t believe how many posts I have started only to delete! Add to that I have given OH permision to read my blog (initially he was banned) and I am now over analysis every word!

I have struggled with whether or not to keep this blog confidential, writing under an alias, not including too many details that can be linked back to myself, or do I just tell everyone this is me? I think partly my job may have something to do with it, I work in social media and so when I spend time blogging for a company I feel pressure that mine should be particularly good – shouldn’t I know what I am doing?!

Anyway, back on task, today I picked BD up from the vets, he has been having trouble walking on his back leg, and despite resting him for three weeks to see if it would go away by natural courses, it didn’t and so long story short, today he went into the vets for some Xrays. As mentioned in my previous post BD has fear aggression, which we are working on (probably will be the focus of many future stories) so when BD was handed back to me from the nurse, the first thing I did was slip back on his muzzle. There were various dogs everywhere and I had to walk past some of them to get out the door, despite being slightly dopped (he has had a general anestheic) I thought it was better to muzzle him. The nurse returned with the medication he is on for the next few days, however her first comment to me was ‘O he didn’t need that while we had him today’ and I felt judge….. then on the way out of the door a very bouncy black lab came bounding in, getting very close to BD and BD snarled at him.

I don’t know how I feel.. do I feel proud that I knew my dog well enough to know this would be a high stress situation and being muzzled meant that he couldn’t harm anyone….or disappointed that my dog felt that I wouldn’t protect him and so felt the need to growl – but that’s a whole different kettle of fish!

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2 thoughts on “Judgement

  1. Wow, thanks so much for sharing this post on my blog. I’m not here to judge you at all. I will share my story with you though. Delilah never reacted until one time at the vets. I was shocked and didn’t know what to do, I had never had it happen before. Well then she did it again and after that it was me that was terrified and I think I transferred some of my fear to her. Once I started getting a handle on what I would do in a given situation she got much better. Incidentally she reacts more when she is ‘trapped’ on a leash then when she is off.

    BTW if you do Social Media, I could use some pointers. 😉

    • send me an email and I will see what I can do to help! Bds reactivity started when he was separated from a dog he lived with (when my ex split up with his ex they took a dog each). Because Mity has never been a problem at the vet I am significantly more relaxed there than the ex and when I take him he is fine. If the ex takes him there is always an incident – I think a lot depends on how we handle the situation!

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